Thomas’ Mom’s Birthday Dinner

Last night we celebrated Thomas' mom's birthday at his brother's house. We had the family and all the significant others over for steak and wine. It was a windy, chilly night, which made family time by the fire especially sweet and comforting. We cooked, ate, drank, and all lounged around afterwards just enjoying each other's company. It's nice when everyone can get together to celebrate isn't it?

Thomas' mom isn't too big on cake so we did cheesecake instead! Thomas made a homemade strawberry glaze to put on top and it was the most sinful, perfect addition. We did our best to only eat one piece each (and we succeeded!).

We somehow forgot candles so Thomas' sister Sydney held the lighter above the cheesecake while we all sang happy birthday. Sometimes you gotta get creative, you know?

Happy birthday, Lila! You are so loved by so many.

Feature Friday with Ariana Offray & Hannah Glover

Happy Friday! What are you up to this weekend? We will be finishing up this presentation we've been working on nonstop and maybe find some time to work on the rental house, too. It's our last weekend home before we leave on a big trip out of the country. It's our first time traveling out of the US so wish us luck! We are so excited!

This week's FF is SO FUN, y'all. They seem like the most down to earth people that we wished weren't all the way across the country so we could actually hang out with them. Ariana and Hannah's style is unique, seemingly effortless and so California cool. And don't get us started on the look and feel of their Instagram and blog. Swoon. As if that weren't enough, what they have to say about each other is pretty darn sweet as well. Take a look below to see what we mean...

Hannah (left) & Ariana (right)

Where are you from? Ariana was born and raised in Pasadena, California while Hannah was born in Savannah, Georgia but moved around. Hannah spent her childhood primarily in Atlanta, Georgia, and finally settled in San Diego, California when she was around 12 years old. 

Where do you live? We currently live in Pasadena, California and we couldn’t be anymore obsessed with it!

What’s your Instagram handle? Y’all can find us on Instagram @theangelinos_

  Age: Ariana turns 23 on January 30th, and Hannah turned 21 on November 21st. 

Relationship Status: We’re two women in a happy relationship. Although Hannah loves to say that we’re married!

What is your favorite place you have ever traveled to and why? We haven’t had the opportunity to travel much. Honestly, it’s tragic to say the least. Ariana’s favorite place she’s traveled to is New Orleans. Her entire family is from New Orleans, so Ariana grew up with creole culture. New Orleans is like no other place. The food is amazing, the culture is full of life, the architecture is original and it’s diverse. Hannah’s favorite place she’s traveled to so far is New York City. In 2016, Hannah spent New Years there visiting her best friend. It was probably life changing. New York is pretty much the opposite of LA, and she loved the experience of visiting a city like NYC. But, it made her realize all the reasons why she lives in California (like the lack of seasons/snow)! We both love traveling and wish we could go more places. 

How did you guys meet? Who asked out who? We met on Tinder. We need a moment of silence for this one…like, guys… Tinder! Who knew an online dating app would match the two of us so perfectly. After about two weeks of chatting on Tinder, we met in person in May of 2016 and hit it off right away. We just knew it was right. In November of 2016, Hannah asked Ariana to be her girlfriend in her dorm room on the night of the 2016 presidential election. We kind of laugh about it because we won’t ever forget our anniversary date because of the significance of that night. 

How did you know each other was the one? I think we both kind of knew the day we met in person. Something felt different. Ariana knew during our second date. We stayed out talking until 2 AM in Hannah’s car in a random parking lot after seeing Deadpool at the movies. Hannah knew for sure during our third date at a museum, which was also the first time Ariana wore her glasses in front of her. (she was insecure about wearing her glasses for the first two dates)

Any big plans for the future? Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Our goals are so in sync! In 10 years, we see ourselves traveling a lot more, getting married, having children (we hope for a boy and a girl) and buying our first home and renovating that home (if it isn’t picture perfect already.) We want to make our home truly ours, so we’ll probably be ripping apart a few things to make sure we’re satisfied. 

How would you describe your home decor style? Our home decor style is a blend of mid-century, traditional, farmhouse and modern. We especially love us some original hard wood floors *faints* 

What is the last show you binged watched? So, let's talk about this. We binge watch shows like there’s no tomorrow. It might be a problem. The last show we binge watched from start to finish was Broadchurch on Netflix. We’re currently binge watching Law & Order SVU. We clearly have a thing for crime and medical tv shows. 

What is something you wish you would have known when you were younger? Ariana wishes she knew everything would turn out alright regardless of any difficulties she was facing at that time. Knowing everything would be okay probably would have saved her a lot of anxiety. Hannah wishes she knew she was gay sooner. This also would have saved her from a lot of everything. 

How old were you when you came out and what was your experience like? Ariana was 17 when she came out. Honestly, her parents reacted in a calm manner. They’re Christians so the terror was real before coming out. They listened, asked questions and then didn’t mention it at all until she was about 20 years old. Considering how it could have gone completely wrong, Ariana’s coming out experience was better than she could have seen coming. 

Hannah was outed by her ex boyfriend when she was 18, but she thought she came out when she was 19, until her younger sister confessed that everyone knew for months before she officially came out. Their reaction was more negative than expected, and the experience was a lot more difficult than she expected, but after a year or so everything turned out alright. 

Have you faced any backlash as a couple since coming out? How do you deal with that? We’re fortunate enough to say we haven’t faced any backlash as a couple. Especially as an interracial couple. We get stares from some people in public, but we mostly ignore it. No one has directly said anything to us, so we continue to live our lives and mind our bidness. 

We love the look and feel of your Instagram! What made you decide you wanted to share an account together? It all started with Ariana. She has always wanted to start a YouTube channel, but her anxiety held her back for years. Around April of 2017, about a year into our relationship, Ariana felt confidant enough to start her YouTube channel and that was the beginning of our online presence. A few months later, Ariana randomly suggested starting a blog together and we jumped right in. Creating a joint Instagram seemed a lot easier than maintaining separate accounts, so we joined forces. Honestly, it’s probably one of the best things to happen to us!

What is your favorite thing about one another? Wow, the list goes on and on, doesn’t it? My favorite thing about Hannah would have to be her crazy good planning skills. I’m not talking planning our dates or what we’re eating that night, I’m talking planning her life, our life. She pictures where she wants to be in a year, 2 years, 3 years down the line and she plans what she needs to do to get there. It has to be a talent or something. I’m not a planner at all so I truly admire this about her.

I love so many things about Ariana, but my favorite is how genuine she is. She’s so grounded about who she is as a person, and she literally could not be fake if she tried. She’s always completely true to herself, and I really adore that about her! Her therapist once said she’s like an island, and I really feel like that's true! She really grounds me and keeps me centered on the present and on what’s important. 

Weird Things Couples Do When They’ve Been Together For A While

We came across this article about weird things that couples do when they've been together for longer than 3 years and we have to admit, a lot of them were pretty spot on. 

A few in particular stood out to us, like "Speaking in a made up language to each other", or "Wear your S.O.'s clothing so much you forget they weren't yours at one point" or even "Have shows that you are obsessive about watching together."

Then there were a few not-so-cutesy ones like: " You stop apologizing for burping and farting around each other" followed by, "And sometimes congratulate them when they do a particularly massive one" that we shamelessly admitted to doing, also. When you're with someone for 8 years, you just can't find time to care about those sort of things. :)

It got us thinking, though, what are some weird things we do together that we might not even realize? Here are a few that come to mind:

PJ talks in weird voices only to Thomas. They're hilarious.

We aren't afraid to let the other one know when they need to shower.

We talk about our dogs and their emotions like they're people. We also have a million nicknames for them and they respond to every one of them.

We have started quoting our inside jokes since we've been telling them for so long.

We get the hair in the hard to reach places for each other. 

We share food, even when the other person doesn't offer to.

Even though it's not the cleanliest, we sometimes share deodorant and toothbrushes.

What about you? Do you do any weird things with your significant other because you've been together so long? 

Grocery Shopping One Day

We went to Walmart yesterday like we do every Sunday. We shopped for the week and pushed the cart down the isles and debated on what we were going to make for dinner each night. I forgot to get something (like always) and had to go back to the opposite end of the store to get. 

When I found what I had forgotten, we began to check out and I stood there, watching PJ put the groceries into the bags and my mind immediately went to when I was 15 or 16.  I remember going to the store with my mom and thinking I would love to go grocery shopping one day with my future husband and walk down the isles together, not caring who sees us or who knows we're married.

We would pick out our favorite foods and talk about our to-do lists, taking turns pushing the cart. We would bag up all the groceries and load them into the back of our car together while one of us returns the cart. I think it's those little, intimate moments I always longed for the most growing up. 

I remember when PJ and I first started dating I used to wish I could fast forward time to when we were more comfortable with each other, married, and doing boring ole' husband stuff. He wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary yesterday, not at all, but to me it was extraordinary. Isn't it crazy how, when you're with the right person, bagging groceries at Walmart suddenly makes you realize your dreams have come true? Because they do, so no matter how badly you want to, don't give up hope. You never know when your own grocery boy will come in and sweep you off your feet. 

-T

Feature Friday with Andy Mientus & Michael Arden

Hey you, happy Friday! What do you have going on this weekend? We plan to work on an upcoming project that we can't wait to tell you about in the next week or so. Also, there will most likely be hours of binge watching Shameless. We are so obsessed with it, we are watching close to 3 hours of it a night. It's becoming a problem.

We are so excited for this week's Feature Friday because they're two friends of ours and their relationship is so inspiring. It's likely you are already aware of Andy and Michael's relationship, but they've opened up about how they make their relationship work while both being in the entertainment industry, their cool new house, and their favorite trip they've ever taken together. Take a look below to see what we mean...

Where are you from? Andy is from Pittsburgh, PA, Michael is from Midland, TX

Where do you live? We split our time between a tiny apartment in the West Village of New York City and a big old Catholic church upstate in the Hudson Valley.

What’s your Instagram handle?  @andymientus and @michaelarden 

Age: Andy is 31 and Michael is 35.

Relationship Status:  Married.

How long have you been married? 8-ish years

What is your favorite place you have ever traveled to and why?

A: We took an amazing road trip once from Portland all the way down to San Francisco, stopping whenever we saw something interesting. We slept at a creepy old mansion in Eureka, drank wine in the Russian River, and took a million photos at the Multnoma Falls. Totally magical.

M: We just had the chance to work together in Tokyo and visit Kyoto. We both fell in love with Japan. I would say it’s a tie between that and our Pacific Northwest Road Trip. 

How did you guys meet? Who asked out who? We met years before we would start dating at the opening night of a short lived Broadway musical Michael was starring in called The Times They Are A-Changin. We became friends and talked often for probably 4 years before we became more than friends.

You both have very demanding careers. Is it hard being away from each other so much? How do you make time for one another? We knew early on that we worked well as a couple because we were both as invested in our own careers and artistic pursuits as we were in each other. We like to think that we go through life side by side, looking in the same direction rather than looking at each other. Thus, whenever our work keeps us apart, we focus on being excited that one of us is getting an opportunity to further his own dreams and try to do what we can to support that rather than be sad about what that means for our time together. We have a whole lifetime to be together. Some apart time to focus on ourselves is good too.

How would you describe your home decor stye? Ecclectic. We have very different interests but we are both collectors, so we both bring lots of strange objects into our house that have to all coexist. We also have picked up a lot of memorabilia over the years from various artistic projects, as well as souvenirs from all of the travel we have done independently and together. As for furniture, we both lived apart for many years and then together in various spaces, so there are pieces from all of those eras thrown together. I think what brings the whole mess into cohesion is that nothing is just for show- everything either has a purpose, a story, or both.

What is the last show you binged watched?

A: British Baking Show. We can’t get enough.

M: Abstract on Netflix. It’s an incredible series about design and designers in all forms. Get into it!

What is something you wish you would have known when you were younger?

A: That things never go according to Plan A. Plan A is a fantasy. 

M: That struggle is part of life. It will always exist. But it will seem insignificant in the long term. Take a breath, have faith and courage. It’s all gonna be okay.

How old were you when you came out and what was your experience like?

A: I was 24. Michael was actually the first guy I was ever with, so my queerness was more mysterious before we got together and thus I didn’t feel the urge to come out before then- I wasn’t quite sure if I was bi or just a really open minded straight person before that. Getting together really made me confront and embrace my queerness for the first time. Luckily my family and friends and even my ex-girlfriends were amazingly supportive, so it was really no big deal. 

M: I was a Freshman in High School, so a BIT younger than Andy. On the first day of school, my English teacher, Shelly Wright, asked us to write an essay about what we learned about ourselves over the summer. I felt compelled to say that I discovered I was a gay man. For some reason, I never hesitated. She pulled me aside later that day in the hallway to thank me for my honesty and to tell me I always had a friend and ally. I think that first interaction shaped my whole coming out experience. I was given room and support and a sense of pride because of her gesture. It’s something I’ll never forget. 

We see that you've recently purchased a not-so-typical house. Tell us about it! Yes! We bought a church! Steeple and everything. In the summer we had a conversation about selling a house we owned in LA which we didn’t use much anymore and either buying an apartment in New York (we rent) or getting a country house upstate. Michael started looking casually and found this church and we just fell in love with it, so suddenly that abstract conversation was a very real decision and we had to work very fast to sell and move so that no one snapped up the church before we could. We spend Christmas there with friends and it was so worth it.

What is your favorite thing about one another?

A: I love the scope and scale of Michael’s imagination. Whereas most people would see the church online and say, “wouldn’t that be cool,” before closing the window and going back to their day, he springs into action and makes it reality. The same is true when he dreams up a creative project or a fun night out. Most people settle for ordinary and safe but he strives for what seems impossible, which is a great way to live your life. 

M: Andy is the smartest and most insightful person I have ever encountered. Every good idea I have comes from him. His mind is constantly working on or revising a thought or notion. And so many times his ideas are sprung from his sense of humor and play.

Our Weekend in Atlanta

This past weekend we made the short trip to Atlanta, GA for the January market and then on Saturday, drove up to the mountains to stay at the most gorgeous cabin tucked away in the woods. Our friend Brian Patrick Flynn set up the whole weekend and brought together the most amazing group of interior designers and we felt so grateful to be included in the mix.

When we got to Atlanta on Thursday, we checked in to our hotel and immediately went to the market. Just so you have an idea of the scale of this thing, there are three huge buildings that connect to one another where the market is held. They each have about 18 floors and on each floor are around 20 to 30 stores, some that are just there temporarily for the market and some that are there year round. Our favorite area of the whole thing was the antiques area #ofcourse. Every booth was filled with the most amazing selections of old pictures, furniture, rugs, lamps, etc. We could have spent the whole day just in that area alone.

We were thisclose to buying these two prints below but at the last minute we changed our minds and bought a small, antique sailboat picture instead.

We wandered around the market and everywhere we turned were these crazy cool displays of art and furniture and if we had the money, we would have taken them all home.

After browsing the market all day, we finally met up with Brian for the first time in person! We've been friends with him for almost four years, but only online. If you don't know him personally, he is just as fun, funny, compassionate, and thoughtful in person as he is on social media. As soon as we met him it felt like we had been friends forever. There was never an awkward getting-to-know-you feeling. 

He introduced us to his designer friends that he invited to the market and, like Brian, we all hit it off immediately and connected so quickly, like we were just friends catching up from not seeing each other in a while. We went out to dinner and talked about our favorite designers, movies, food, and places to travel. Then we went up the elevator to the top floor of the Mariott Marquis (where they were all staying) and it was so breathtakingly fun and scary at the same time. Did you know The Hunger Games was filmed here? 

Stunning, right? Then we tried to take a bunch of photos and be artsy but it wasn't happening. So we just started laughing at ourselves instead.

The next day we went to a luncheon to hear The Beekman Boys talk about their new products which was such a treat. We heard about them way back in 2010 when Thomas' older sister showed us their new TV show. We've been huge fans ever since.

After the luncheon, we waited in line for 45 mins to get them to sign a copy of their new cook book! The line was wrapped around the store but we had fun talking to people in line and even meeting a few followers from Instagram.

Then that night we got dressed and went to the Pantone Ultra Violet Party to support Brian and his beautiful vignette he designed! We met so many talented designers, danced to the amazing band, and laughed the whole time. We also met a couple of you while we were there, too! Such a small world, isn't it?

The picture above is of us and our new BFFs. We're only missing Susan, but these women sure do know how to have a good time and they kept us laughing the entire weekend. We miss them already.

After we left the party we headed to this delicious Vietnamese restaurant called Le Fat where we got to know each other even more over Vietnamese coffee and drunken noodles.

We woke up to a blistering cold, rainy day for a our last day in Atlanta. We packed our bags, went to the market one last time, then hit the road for cabin in the mountains.

When we got to Brian's cabin, we were greeted by a light dusting of snow and the most beautiful views of the mountaintops. For as far as you could see there were nothing but trees and clouds just begging for you to stare at them. It was so peaceful.

If you think the view outside is nice, just Wait until you see the inside. Brian's cabin is the perfect blend of masculinity and woodsy, but still bright and welcoming. It has a Ralph Lauren Polo vibe to it. We're still not over the white floors. Take a look:

How talented is Brian? He designs are always so innovative and unexpected. Can we talk about the Natalie Portman Closer picture in the top left bunk? Enough said. He's been designing the HGTV Dream Home and Urban Oasis for the last couple of years and each one is so uniquely different from the next. He's not afraid to take chances and we absolutely love that.

Once all of the girls got there, Shay whipped up this spread in 5 mins and we all changed into our pajamas for the night and hung out while Susan baked a homemade chocolate cake. We got into deep discussions about design and other important topics, but the crazy fun really started to happen when we played Cards Against Humanity. Have you ever played? It's completely ridiculous and hilarious but will keep you entertained for hours. We didn't end up going to bed until almost 2am but man was it a fun night and it's all because of Brian and his husband Hollis, and all these amazing women.

We woke up the next morning, took some pictures with everyone, headed into town to eat at this great little restaurant in Blue Ridge, GA called The Black Sheep and said our goodbyes.

To wrap this waaaay too long post up, we want to thank you, Brian, Hollis, Susan, Jen, Jody, Erica, Shay, Tami, Krista, and Brianna, for your kindness and your candidness. You all welcomed us into your lives with honesty and compassion and we can't tell you enough how much fun we had with you all this past weekend. We feel so inspired and refreshed now that we're home, already planning our next get together with everyone. Until next time, y'all!

PS- if you want to check out our weekend in more detail, check out the video below and be sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel!

Feature Friday with Steven Pham & Steven Jones

Happy Friday! What are you up to this weekend? We are in Atlanta until Saturday at the AmericasMart January market and we are having a blast. We’ve met so many cool people and finally got to meet Brian Patrick Flynn in person, one of our good friends that until yesterday we’d ony we met online. He’s the one who actually set this all up for us to be able to come, so thank you again Brian!  

This week’s FF includes not one, but two Steven’s who met in college and, five years later, recently got married! Their story is honest and beautiful, especially their proposal (so cute!!!). Read on to see what their favorite thing about each their is and how they knew each other were the one. BRB, we have tooth aches from the sweetness 😍.  

Steven Jones (left) Steven Pham (right)

 Where are you from? Steven J is from Springfield, Massachusetts and Steven P is from Long Island, New York

Where do you live? Louisiana, as Steven J is stationed here for the time being. 

What’s your Instagram handle?  @vinhtpham @muthalovajones

Age: Steven J is 24 and Steven P is 25

Relationship Status: Married 

How long have y’all been together and how did you two meet? We met in college. My (Steven Pham) twin brother put a post on Facebook asking for a third roommate to live with or freshmen year and Steven responded. We checked his profile and thought he’d be a perfect fit with all the similar interests we all had. As roommates from the start of our college career we became friends in 2011 but our relationship started the year after, so we’ve been together for about 5 and a half years.

Congratulations on your big day! Who proposed to who? Steven P proposed to me while we were on vacation with my family in upstate New York. I had no idea it was going to happen. We played college volleyball and he had a ball outside and asked me to go get the ball from the ground. “Will you marry me?” was written on it and at first, I thought he stole someone else’s ball because it had something written on it haha. I didn’t put two and two together until I turned around and he was kneeling with a ring. 

What is your favorite thing about each other? Steven Jones - It is hard to choose when you love everything about someone. So one of my favorite things about Steven is his mannerisms. In public or out with others, he can be a little more reserved. When we’re together, you can see these quirks here and there that just make me smile. It’s very small things whether it’s a certain way he laughs or smiles, the way he gets excited about random things, or even how he has these slight twitches just when he is about to really fall asleep. Those quirks he has makes him who he is and I love that about him.

Steven Pham – There are so many things to love about him but if I had to choose it would be his sense of humor. He always has a way of making me laugh and look like an idiot. It is one of the reasons I love him. I tend to take life too seriously and he makes me laugh at myself.

How would you describe your home décor style? In terms of our home décor style we are still figuring that out. We have only recently been living together although we enjoy modern design with a rustic charm.

Any big plans for the future? Where do you see yourselves in 10 years? With Steven being in the military we may be moving here and there. But I can definitely see our family growing whether it’s getting a pet or two, having a child, or both! 

​How did you know he was the one Steven J – For some, it hits them all at once. For me, it was simply a general realization that he was the one and I couldn’t be any happier. I always find myself looking at him, whether he’s sleeping, watching TV, or if he’s on his phone, and I smile. He is the reason why I’m happy.

Steven P – My feelings for Steven were strong from the start. After knowing him for a year as close friends it wasn’t until I came out to him my sophomore year when it all started. Unaware that he had similar feelings I was caught off guard. Within the week that we spent from that moment was all I needed and I knew what I had in front of me. I said “I love you” in a short period of time without any expectation of hearing it in return. He is passionate about his life goals and supportive and caring to the people in his life. Loving him was easy and I knew he was the one.

What is one thing still left on your bucket list? We still have to travel around the world. It’s tough sometimes since Steven J has to be stationed in a certain places and he deploys for 6 months here and there. We both have are responsibilities that make it tough but traveling to other countries and exploring the world is something we still have to do.

How old were you when you came out and what was your experience like? Steven J – I never really had a coming out story. There wasn’t a single moment in time where I let the world know that I felt a little differently than others. In high school, I told my twin brother and really close friends. In college I told my parents, other brothers, and more friends. It wasn’t until Steven and I got engaged when I told a lot more of my family and friends because I wanted to share how I felt about him, with them.

Steven P – My coming out is not much different from Steven’s. Sharing the part of me I kept a secret for a long time was made easier when I found Steven. Together as we grew we came out to those who mattered to us, whether it was family or friends. It was the support we had for each other that never made it hard to do. However we were fortunate enough to be surrounded by loving friends and family that supported us and helped build us up and celebrated our news.

Have you faced any backlash or hardships as a couple? The main hardship we had faced was when we were together but not living with each other. With Steven being in the military, he has to go to certain places or deploy to different areas and we can’t always be with one another. We were accustomed to being together every day of our college career and it made dealing with different time zones and long distance hard when you just want to be with the one you love.  

What have you learned about how to make relationships last? Communication is such a big deal, especially when a big part of your life is away for training or a long deployment. A relationship can’t work if you don’t talk to each other. Thoughts and feelings can be understood only so much through nonverbal cues or actions. You have to express yourself through your voice to your partner for them to fully get you and I feel we do that more and more every day.

Weekend Getaway to Atlanta

We woke up early this morning, packed our bags, and hit the road to make the two hour drive to Atlanta. Our friend Brian, who we’ve only ever met through social media (until today!), invited us to the January Market at AmericasMart!

We are so excited to see all of the amazing  designs and sight see around Atlanta a little bit. We’ve actually never stayed overnight in Atlanta together before so this is a nice little mini vacation that we’ve been looking forward to. 

We will be posting some updates on Instagram and you can expect a YouTube coming soon, too. We may even do a meet and greet on Saturday morning, but we’re still trying to work everything out for y’all that.

The view from our hotel room:​

We plan on making the most out of this trip! Maybe we’ll see you at the market? 

Ways to Say I Love You

If you think about it, there are so many different ways of telling a person that you love them without coming right out and saying the words. A lot of the time, we tell them just as much with all of other, daily things we say to them.

"Buckle up, please."

"Do you want to get coffee?"

"Let me draw you a bath."

"Let me know when you get to work."

"You look beautiful today."

"Let me take care of the ___, you've had a long day."

"Let's watch a movie tonight. You pick."

"No, you can have the bigger piece."

Sometimes, when you're with someone for so long, you don't realize that the small things you do or say for your spouse are really just you reminding them of how much you love them. It almost becomes second nature, like breathing, you know? There are so many different ways of saying I love you, sometimes we just need a little reminder of what "I love you" looks and feels like to us. 

Changing Our Last Names After Getting Married

One of the biggest questions we receive on a regular basis is how we decided on who’s name to take after we got married. It’s an important topic for some. To other’s, not so much (looking at you, PJ!).

Sharing a last name, much like wearing a wedding ring, changing your relationship status on Facebook, or even taking the big step and getting married, is symbol of love. A symbol to show the world that you are a family, that you’re in it for the long haul. A name is just a name, but it can mean so much more when it’s shared.

Having the same last name was important to Thomas, and like we said above, not so much to PJ. For one, PJ already has four names, so adding a fifth by hyphenating our last names would be a mouth full. For two, PJ likes his last name and never planned on changing it, really. And for three, PJ is a realtor and is known professionally around town by his first and last name, so it was also a business decision to take PJ’s last name of McKay.

Thomas was never crazy about his last name anyway, so the decision to take on PJ’s instead of just hyphenating it was fairly easy for us. And, just to be clear, Thomas still kept his original last name and just made it a second middle name. So, now he has four names just like PJ 😉. Another important thing we considered was that when we have children, we want everyone to have the same last name so there would be no confusion. That was the biggest consideration we took when deciding to finally make the change.

We talk more about changing our last name and break down the steps on how to do that, legally, in our newest YouTube video. Keep in mind that the difficulty of changing your last name can vary depending on what state you live in, so the explanation in the video below is from our perspective living here in Tennessee.

Like we said, changing your last name after getting married is just a symbol, but it sure is a powerful symbol of love, don’t you think? It’s showing the world that two men can share a life together and raise a family just like any other couple. It’s showing folks that we want the same things everyone wants. And it’s a sign of love to one another that we are in this together.

Love,

The McKays

Oprah's Golden Globes Speech

Did you watch The Golden Globes last night? The whole evening was scattered with powerful messages about women’s rights, with everyone wearing all black to show their support for standing up against sexual harassment to women. The #MeToo and Time’s Up movements were in full force and it gave us chills to see so many powerful people stand for what is right and to speak up and call out those who are to blame.

There was one speech that absolutely stole the show, though. Oprah’s moving speech brought us to tears. So eloquent, so passionate, so important, and so needed in times like these. If you haven’t seen it, we highly recommend watching it above.

Also, here are the big #MeToo and Time’s Up moments from the show.

Google: Year in Search 2017

Google released their annual Year in Search video a few weeks ago and we can't stop watching it. Take a look if you haven't seen it yet.

We Finally Got a PO Box!

After months and months of telling ourselves we needed to get one, and for some reason aways putting in on the back burner, we finally got our very own PO Box! We love hearing from you guys online but we've been hearing from more and more of you that you might also be interested in sending us physical mail. Now you can!

We are so excited to be able to connect with you this way. It's one thing to see pictures and words online, but it's such a great feeling to talk via a hand written letter isn't it? There's something so intentional and thoughtful about writing a letter to someone. We're here to answer any questions or help in any way we can. 

Can we talk about our box for a second? It's located downtown and it looks like it hasn't been used in decades. We opened it up and laughed because of all the cobwebs and dust. Oh, and ours is 939, not 938. The picture is a little misleading :).

So, Lisa at USPS kindly wrote the address on the post it above, but just in case, our PO Box address is:

PO Box 939

Cleveland, TN 37364-0939

We can't wait to hear from you. Happy Friday! We hope you have a great weekend.

Feature Friday with Nick Perez

Happy Friday! It's the first weekend of the new year and 2018 is already shaping up to be a good year, but man is it freezing. Seriously, this bomb cyclone is absolutely no joke. Please stay as safe and warm as you can this weekend. We plan to stay in and work on our rental house. The finish line is in sight!

This week's FF shares his inspiring coming out story and how his parents took it. Nick talks about how surprised he was by his family's reaction, what he wished he would have known when he was younger, and his favorite artist at the moment (she's on of PJ's favorites too!). We think you'll enjoy learning about Nick as much as we have. Take a look below to see what we mean...

Where are you from? Pembroke Pines, Florida. I am Cuban American. 

Where do you live? Orlando, Florida

What’s your Instagram handle? @nickperez18

Age: 24 (but I turn 25 on Saturday) *Happy Birthday Nick!*  

Relationship Status: Single 

What is your favorite place you have ever travelled to and why? My favorite place I have ever traveled to is probably St. Thomas, US Virgin Islands. I am fortunate enough to have visited most of the Caribbean do to where I live, and my families love for going on cruises. So this island is particularly special. I vividly remember the beach we found called Trunk Bay and it had the most pristine snorkeling site that I have ever been to, it was truly a hidden paradise. We spend the whole day exploring the reef and the beach and the edges for the forest, it was a great adventure. It was always an adventure to get to these more hidden places and I remember the great family memories we had on the island whenever we would visit. 

Who is your favorite artist at the moment? Favorite song? At the moment my favorite artist is Dua Lipa. And favorite song of her's is New Rules, I will always jam out to it whenever I hear it come on. 

What is your proudest accomplishment? My proudest accomplishment has to be graduating from nursing school and passing my nursing boards and getting my dream job in the PICU all within 5 months. 2017 was crazy for those reasons but it was truly amazing seeing all my hard work pay off. 

How would you describe your home décor style? I would say my decor style would be Modern Rustic style. I like clean lines, brightly lit rooms, whites, grays, and blues, and all accompanied with older or cozy accent pieces that can bring a home or space together. Basically anything Joanna Gaines designs I love. 

What is something you wish you would’ve known when you were younger? I wish I would've known not to be scared to be who I was. That your true friends and family will love and accept you no matter what. 

What is one thing still left on your bucket list? Travel and backpack on my own throughout Europe. I have still yet to travel across the ocean so I would love to spend time in my home land of Spain and experience what my ancestors once have in those ancient countries. And to do it alone and just take it all in on my own time and meet new people along the way seems like a great adventure. 

How old were you when you came out and what was your experience like? I came out to friends when I was at college when I was about 20, and they were extremely positive and supportive and I honestly had a great support system. I came out to my family when I was 23. That was much harder for me. I never really came out to them at first because I was truly scared of what their reactions to having a gay son would be. Growing up in a Cuban-Catholic family, being gay was never really an option and never talked about. But one day I was talking to guy for a few months and something deep down told me that I needed to just come out clean to my parents. And so on October 20th, 2015 I came out to my mom and dad. And it was the best decision I have ever made. They were extremely accepting and loving and I was truly shocked by their reaction. They even apologized to me for making me feel scared to talk to them about that or anything, and that I can always come to them and talk to them about anything. They told me all that mattered was my happiness and they would stand by me no matter what. It was truly the greatest feeling in the world. 

What have you learned about yourself in your coming out process? I have learned that I have truly the greatest family and friends who support and love me in all that I do. I learned that I can express myself more and communicate ideas more freely because I am no longer scared of being judged. Yes being gay is very important to me and is part of my identity but it doesn't define me as a person because there is so much more to me that just that, and I think that more people need to understand that, but I am lucky to be surrounded by people who do. 

Have you faced any backlash or criticism since coming out? Honestly I am blessed to say that I have not faced any backlash or criticism in the coming out process. Everyone has been so loving and kind and supportive. And frankly we live in a time where many people just see me for being me and that is what is truly amazing. It was great to see people I meet or friends not even care about it cause that isn't what defines me and as long as I am the happy go lucky guy that I am nothing else really matters. And for that I am blessed

Who is your biggest inspiration and why? My parents. I can't just pick one of them. My dad because he has taught me so much, I am the man today because of him. His drive and determination to support his family is something I have never seen before and I want to be like that when I am a father. My mom because she is such a fun and loving person. She has a passion for everything she does or wants to do. She also never gives up, no matter what obstacle is thrown her way she always preservers. They are my rocks and together I want to be like them. 

Out & About Nashville

We recently gave an interview detailing about how we met and what we love most about sharing our relationship on social media to Out & About Nashville and it's currently live in their January issue! If you don't get the magazine, there's also an online PDF version that you can see here. 

We're on pages 13 and 14 so you'll have to click a few times to get to our story. We had a lot of fun talking to Stephen, the writer, so be sure to check it out! Maybe you'll learn something new about us that you didn't know before?

Our New Year’s Resolutions

Every year we make resolutions that we try our best to stick to throughout the year. Do you make New Year's resolutions? Do you follow through with them? Maybe they’re big, ambitious goals or maybe they’re small, easily attainable goals. Maybe you don’t make any!

This year we have a few things we are going to work on. Honestly nothing big or dramatic, just a few ways to better ourselves in areas we feel need extra attention. Here are our official 2018 New Year's Resolutions:

Thomas'

• Stop saying "I want this" or "I wish we had that" and learn to just be happy with what we have. There are some things in this house that still aren't complete or that I wish we had but it's a happy and loving home, so what more can I ask for?
• Get back in shape. This one is on everyone's list and it's on mine, too. We kind of fell off our rhythm when we were filming the show and we are both ready to get back on it and start taking care of our bodies again. 
• Learn when to put the phone down. We document so much of our lives that it's become instinct to pick up our phones or camera and record when something cool or exciting is happening, but sometimes it's nice to just enjoy the moment for what it is, when it's happening and leave it at that. Not everything needs to be published, sometimes being present without technology, human to human, is so much more satisfactory.
• Be there more for family and friends. I felt as though this past year we made everything about us in our small, close circle. We were shooting the show for six months, then it premiered, then we were promoting it like crazy, then we moved into the new house, etc. Our family and friends were there every step of the way helping us and this next year I want to return the favor any way I can and make life more about them, than about us. 

PJ's

• Minimize! We've collected so much STUFF over the years because we think we'll need this or that later on. Our closets and spare bedrooms are filled with stuff we are looking to get rid of next year.
• Stop stressing over the little things. This next year I will do my best to just let things go and realize what I have control over and what I don't, and the things I don't I won't stress over as much. Life is too short to worry about every. little. thing.
• Say "yes" more often. Thomas always tells me that I'm a "no" person, meaning I immediately say no to most things. I think I will try saying yes to more things this year. Or at least think a little harder before saying no ;).
• Eat healthier and work out more. This one goes along with Thomas' up there. We basically quit working out this past year with the show and promoting it and moving and just with life happening in general. We are going to work harder in 2018 to get back on the right track health wise.
• Make more time for family. Also in the same realm of Thomas' above. Family is the most important thing in the world to me and I look forward to showing them that this year. 

If you want to see our new year's resolutions listed in 60 seconds, check out the video below!

Breakfast Room Progress

The room in the center of our house has had a couple of names since we moved in. At first we called it "the library", because we were going to put bookshelves in eventually. Eventually has now turned into "umm maybe YEARS down the line or possibly never, whichever comes first." We had a rug in there when we first moved in that has since moved to our bedroom. Below is how it looked on our TV pilot "Down to the Studs".

So then we called it "the center hall" because, well, it's in the center of our house and we only used it as a hallway to pass through to get to other rooms in the house. We didn't have any chairs around it then and it felt very staged. You can see that phase below.

Now, we call it "the breakfast room" because we currently have chairs around the table and eat most of our meals there. We have a 9 ft dining room table (in the back of the picture above) that we usually only eat at for special occasions. Otherwise, you'll mostly find us eating at this table in the room of a thousand names. 

We've been very slowly filling it with frames and plan on doing some more above the table with the lamp on it to the right. This room gets the most amazing light in the winter and is right between the living room and the kitchen, so you feel like you're right in the middle of all the action. A room that we weren't sure what to do with when we moved in has suddenly become the central hub of the house.

Sometimes it just takes living in a house to get a feel and understand each room, you know? We plan on doing that a lot this year :).

Sources:

• Chairs
• Floor lamp (similar)
• Table lamp
• Stairwell garland

Hello, 2018!

We woke up to a bitterly cold New Year’s Day, with the sun pouring in the hundred year-old windows and flooding the living room with possibilities. It’s 2018 y’all!!!

We brought in the new year with family as the ball dropped at 12am and a whole new year began right before our eyes. We stayed home and made grilled cheeses with pesto and a homemade tomato bisque soup. Thomas’ mom brought white bean chicken chili and all of it together made for a warm, cozy night in to battle the 13 degree weather that was happening outside.  

There’s always such a sense of possibility in the new year, isn’t there? It feels like you get to start over, be whoever you want to be, a second chance. If you don’t need to start over, though, there’s still a feeling of a excitement that this is the year you are going to be the best version of yourself. 

Happy New Year to you, friend! We’re glad to have you here with us in 2018.