Down for the Count

Oh friends. Remember when I talked about how parenting (in general) is not for the faint of heart? Well it turns out that parenting when you don’t feel your best is even harder. PJ had a migraine for 24 hours this weekend and my back was killing me. I’ve had back issues for years (we both have, actually) and, unfortunately, this weekend I did something to my lower back that is making it hard to even stand right now. Luckily PJ’s migraine went away, so he has taken lead with the kids and cooking for the last few days.

When you don’t feel good, all you want to do is curl up on the couch and watch TV, but my back is making it hard to get comfortable standing or sitting, so even doing that is not much of a relief. We have a busy week of projects and appointments for the kiddos next week, so here’s hoping this strain doesn’t last long! xx

PS: new YouTube video

Cinnamon Oatmeal Banana Bread

Good morning, friends, and happy Friday!

I made this cinnamon oatmeal banana bread last night and wanted to share it here because it’s the perfect warm and yummy treat for the weekend. I don’t know what I was expecting while making it, but this bread is the definition of comforting. It’s like a giant hug or an oversized sweater in your mouth, which is especially welcome right now because as I look out the window while writing this, it’s a frigid 24 degrees.

We had some old bananas that I was holding onto for weeks (that PJ smartly told me to freeze until I was ready to actually make something with them) to make some sort of cinnamon banana bread, but at the last minute I decided I wanted to add oatmeal into the mix, too. Cinnamon oatmeal banana bread? Is that even a thing? A quick Google search revealed that it in fact was a thing, and it was a thing that looked absolutely delicious. So I started baking.

I ended up going with this recipe from My Gourmet Connection. Fair warning: PJ asked if I cut the sugar any, which I didn’t, so if you like your breads a little sweet, you may want to add a bit more sugar than what the recipe calls for. I thought it tasted great as is (the kids did, too!), but I think we could all use a little more sweetness in our lives, don’t you?

Full recipe and directions below, directly from My Gourmet Connection:

Ingredients:

• 1 cup quick cooking oats

• 2 large eggs, lightly beaten

• 1/2 cup milk

• 3 medium ripe bananas, mashed

• 1/3 cup vegetable oil

• 2 cups all-purpose flour

• 1/3 cup sugar

• 2 teaspoons baking powder

• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda

• 1/2 teaspoon salt

• 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

For the topping:

• 1/3 cup quick cooking oats

• 2 teaspoons sugar

• 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

• 2 tablespoons butter, melted

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease the bottom of a 9 x 5 inch loaf pan.

2. Combine the topping ingredients in a small bowl and set aside.

3. Combine the oats with the milk and set aside for 10 minutes to soften. Add the bananas, oil, eggs, and vanilla extract to the softened oats. Mix well.

4. Combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Add in the banana mixture and combine until dry ingredients are moistened.

5. Spread the bread batter in the prepared loaf pan. Sprinkle the topping evenly over the top and pat down gently into the surface of the bread. Bake for 50-60 minutes, or until the edges pull away from the pan slightly and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

6. Cool for 10 minutes in the pan, then remove to a wire cooling rack.

Hope you have the coziest weekend ever, and happy baking!

Hump Day Mood

Believe it or not, that’s actually Alyster mid yawn (not viciously trying to eat the phone).

A busy day ahead and I have exactly zero energy. Need. More. Coffee. STAT. Side note: how cute are cat’s tiny little middle teeth? I had never noticed them before I read an article a few years ago and now it’s all I see whenever Alyster opens his mouth.

Happy hump day friends. xx

A Promised Land

I received President Obama’s new book for Christmas this year from my soon-to-be sister-in-law (thanks again, Mariah!) and I’ve been eager to dive into it ever since. I’m only on page 9 and I’m already hooked. Obama’s writing is so clear and concise and his prose is beautiful. The book is a fascinating peek at his early life and the eight years he was in office, so I’ve heard, and I can’t wait to get to the juicy parts of his presidency (and his thoughts on the last administration).

Happy Tuesday to you!!

A Huge Thank You and a Sincere Apology

Nothing like starting the week off with an apology, right?

This is on my mind today so I wanted to talk to you about it. First, I want to start off by saying thank you, thank you, THANK YOU.

Thank you for the kindness and the love you have extended to our family over the last five years. Having this community of smart, strong, brave people has been so incredible and we feel incredibly grateful for you every day. And ever since the kiddos came to live with us a year and a half ago, seeing the love you have sent to them has been overwhelming in the best way possible. To know that so many of you care about and send love to them is the best feeling in the world. Thank you for that.

I am trying to say thank you in a way that doesn’t sound pretentious or self-absorbed. We never take your presence or your time for granted, and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts for being here with us. Hearing your stories and learning your backgrounds has taught us so much about life, about the world, and about ourselves. The lessons we’ve gained from you are irreplaceable and honestly, we’re so much better because of them.

We read every email, letter, comment, message, and package you send us and are immensely grateful for you, for all of you. But I want to say I’m sorry. Lately I have fallen behind on responding to the things you send us and I feel so awful about it. The letters and cards, though they have been read, have started piling up in my “respond to” stack and they glare at me with seething eyes every single day. It’s so bad, y’all. And I am so sorry. I think about you every time I walk by and see them and I think, “If I just sit down for 10 min I can write them back and it will mean so much to everyone involved!” But then a dog needs to be fed or a kid needs to go poo-poo or dinner needs to be made and I lose track of time. Rinse and repeat.

I feel guilty for us even having a PO Box when I can’t respond to everything you send in. The kiddos received SO many gifts for Christmas from you all this year, and I think that was the hardest thing to not respond to. You put so much time and effort and love into everything you send and we can feel it as soon as we open the packages.

Please know we see everything you send in, even if you don’t get a response from us (or it takes us weeks to get back to you!). I don’t think I could have anticipated, no matter how many parenting blogs I read or people I got advice from, just how busy and all-consuming (in the best way!) kids would be. I feel like by the end of most days I have zero energy left and all my bandwidth is used up. What then?

But the truth is, lots of people have kids and still find time to get done what they need to/want to. So I will keep working on it and in the meantime, I ask for grace in responding to your sweet, kind correspondence. The quickest and easiest way to reach us is by email (propertyloversemail@gmail.com), so please always feel free to send something that way! I hope you understand and again, thank you SO much for showing our family so much love. You mean more to us than you’ll ever know.

xoxoxo

Have a Great Weekend

Good morning, friends.

After a chilly last few days at home, I made crispy cheesy stacked potatoes last night (in muffin tins, no less!) from Half Baked Harvest and omg they were so good. Tieghan comes up with the best recipes ever and after last night, I’m wondering how 30 years of my life have gone by without ever having made potatoes like that. From here on out, there is only my life before crispy cheese stacked potatoes and after crispy cheese stacked potatoes.

Do you have any plans this weekend? Right now, the only plans we have are editing this week’s YouTube video and hopefully spending some time out at the land if it warms up. I’m sipping my coffee as the sun is slowly coming up and the house is sleeping, and I always like to refer to this part of the day as the calm before the storm, even though, in truth, it’s not so much a “storm” when everyone wakes up, but it is when our day begins and it doesn’t usually stop until long after the sun goes down.

What a week, y’all. So very glad it’s the weekend. Stay warm, and have a good one!!! xoxo

For the First Time in 4 Years, I Feel Hopeful

The importance of today cannot be overstated.

I want to start off by saying how I have personally felt over the last four years, and that is uncomfortable, worried, uneasy, and unsafe. I shared my feelings and beliefs this summer on the blog and they were in turn shared on a FB group who, let’s say did not share the same feelings as me towards the last administration. I don’t want to get too much into that, nor do I want to spend too much time writing about the negative effects of our old President. Instead, I would love to discuss some takeaways from today’s inauguration.

I had been looking forward to today for the last four years. That sounds like a joke, but I am so very serious. When Biden was elected President at the end of last year, I, as millions of others, let out the biggest sigh of relief. I immediately felt hope, optimism, relief, excitement, and at ease. I knew the future looked so much brighter than what we’d experienced during the last administration. I know America has so much work to do to make up for the last 4 years of lies and corruption and violence and racism, but I have to believe we’re all up to the task.

It will feel strange to live in a country where the current administration listens to scientists and facts, where they empower and accept minorities and don’t try to oppress people’s rights just because they look different than they do. Biden’s cabinet picks are officially the most diverse of any President. History!!! Speaking of, so much history was made today. Can you believe it? Vice President Kamala Harris (can I just say how much I love writing that entire title?) is the first woman, and first woman of color, to become Vice President of the United States. Black women all across America DID THAT. The Democratic Party seems to always be at the forefront of change, of breaking through barriers, and I am so proud to call myself a Democrat today. And don’t even get me started (or do) on Amanda Gorman and her breathtaking and beautiful poem “The Hill We Climb”. I got chills and started to tear up listening to her stunning, timely words and rhymes. Highly recommend watching.

I feel confident that the next 4 years will be a time of positive change here in America. Where climate change and racial injustice and Covid-19 will be taken seriously and dealt with appropriately, instead of being dismissed and tossed under the rug. I feel confident that there is still so much hard work ahead of us all, but together, and with strength and determination, we can achieve greatness as a unified country. We are still so divided as a whole, and it’s somewhat overwhelming to think about all that must be done to right all the wrongs we’ve caused, and not just in the last 4 years, but the last few hundred years.

As a member of a minority group it’s easy to feel like our wants and needs are overlooked, even as the gay rights movement has picked up substantially over the last decade. I definitely didn’t feel like it was a priority during the last administration, but I feel like things will be different this time around. We have a President who is intelligent, compassionate, caring, and seems to have the people’s best interest at heart, especially those in minority groups.

Don’t get me wrong. I do not agree with everything Democrats stand for and believe in. I loved Obama, but he was not a perfect President, nor a perfect man. But mostly, I had faith in him and supported him and truly believed he put America first. To put it plainly, I did not feel that way about 45.

But a new dawn is on the horizon and there is electricity in the air and optimism in our hearts. A new year, a new presidency. Same problems, same country, but a renewed sense of possibility is taking over and I can’t shake the feeling of hope I’ve had all day. All day I’ve been at peace, smiling and taking deep breaths and savoring this historic moment. Living in the south, in a conservative town, it’s easy to get lost in the politics, but today felt different. Today was different.

May we all go forward with love in our hearts and compassion leading the way. We have so much work to do, but something tells me we’re all willing to put in the blood, sweat, and tears that it requires. For the first time in 4 years, I feel hopeful for the future and what it means for us all.

PS: The Deep Meaning of the Color Purple at the Biden Inauguration

The Significance of the Bible Joe Biden is Using on Inauguration Day

above photos via Variety, APNews, Deadline.

Breaking News: Parenting a 3 Year Old is Not for the Faint of Heart

Friends, we are currently in the very thick of raising a 3 year old. Even though little sis just turned 3 earlier this month, it feels like she has been at her current age for months.

Can we just state the obvious right off the bat and say that parenting a 3 year old is not for the faint of heart? She is the second one to be at this age in our care after little brother went through a similar, albeit different, experience last year (older brother was 4 when we got them). The thing is, she is the love of our life, truly, and our family wouldn’t be complete without her. But she is miss independent to the fullest right now and it’s coming through in the form of yelling (screaming?) “NO!” every time she doesn’t want to do something. Or sometimes she’s blankly say, with no enthusiasm or feeling whatsoever, “no…”. It’s so matter of factly that I often can’t help but start to laugh because it’s so damn cute.

Honestly, looking back on it while writing this, it’s comical because she’s 3 and nobody can tell her anything right now (so don’t even try). She is so hilarious and so cute and so smart and she learns something new and says something new almost every day, and it brings us the most incredible joy raising her during this time in her life. I am excited to look back on these hard months and laugh in the next few years (with her next to us, of course) at how difficult it all seemed at the time. Because doesn’t it always seem worse in the moment than it really was?

I posted on Instagram tonight about how much I love doing life and parenting with PJ and how, though it isn’t perfect, there are some nights where it feels pretty damn close to is. That’s kind of where I’m at right now: today was hard with sis, very hard actually, but tucking her in and laying down with her as she ooo’d and aaaah’d and pointed at her nightlight that casts dancing colored stars around her room, I thought (as I think pretty much every night) how did we get so lucky? Out of all of the people these kiddos could have been placed with, how were we the ones who get to say good night to them night after night?

It’s so easy to get frustrated in the moment when they’re being naughty or acting out, but the friggin truth is we would be lost without them. Because we would be. So even though she’s been the pickiest eater lately and refuses almost everything we put down in front of her, and doesn’t always come when we ask her to, and throws whatever is in her hand (and I really mean whatever) when she gets angry, sis is the absolute definition of love, light, and beauty. She is our world, and even though her brothers probably wouldn’t admit it, I know she’s theirs, too.

I wish everyone could have the chance to know and love her like we do, but you’re just going to have to take my word for it on how great she is. Parenting a 3 year old is not for the faint of heart, but it is absolutely the best decision we ever made.

The Spectacular Day of Doing Nothing

I am writing this on a cold Monday night after an entire day of doing absolutely nothing. I can’t remember the last time that happened. And it was everything we needed it to be and more.

Our family is always going going going, and we never have days where we have nothing to do and nowhere to be. Except for today. We woke up extra early to drink our coffee and pick up the house a bit before one of PJ’s family members came by to tell us something extremely important, but after that, it was all about eating and taking naps and watching TV. The best part was the sun was shining all day, but it stayed consistently cold, so I didn’t feel guilty about us not spending more time outside.

I never changed out of my comfy clothes (that are borderline pajamas) and drank multiple cups of coffee and even TOOK A NAP. 2021 has been crazy for multiple reasons, and in no way am I diminishing the severity and importance of recent events, but on a personal note, I haven’t taken a nap in I don’t even know how long, so it was wild that I actually had the opportunity to pass out for an hour. I didn’t want to get up, it felt so good. I think if this was a year ago I would have actually felt somewhat guilty for falling asleep in the middle of the day, but these days I am considering it a blessing.

We ended the night with PJ dancing with the kiddos and older brother reading us all a book before bed. And at the risk of sounding like everything was perfect and easy and there are never any problems in our life, we are raising 3 kids under the age of 6, so is anything ever easy when dealing with that many at that age group? Scattered throughout this peaceful, restful day were fits of crying and screaming and older brother shutting the back door on his finger and little sis refusing to eat her dinner (per usual), so if you find yourself rolling your eyes when you read the blog sometimes, just know we’re right in the thick of it, yet trying to focus (and remember) on the positives in life.

Because isn’t it so damn easy to focus on the opposite?

Your Top Words for 2021

Last week on Instagram, we shared a few of our words for 2021 (like simplify and be) and asked what words YOU would add. You sent some extremely inspiring ideas our way and we had so much fun pouring through them that we wanted to write them all down somewhere to look back on and to give us all a little inspiration for the new year (because it’s already off to a pretty rocky start, isn’t it?)

Below are the words that kept popping up again and again, in no particular order. I love the sense of renewal everyone hopes to have this year after the mess that was 2020. Of course, a date on the calendar does not mean a complete restart- it’s more of a renewed state of mind and a commitment to yourself (and to others) to accomplish what you want to for the year.

Without further ado, your top words for 2021:

• Resilience

• Purge

• Revitalize

• Selfcare

• Love

• Mindful

• Explore

• Celebrate

• Heal

• Survive

• Hope

• Happy

• Dream

• Drink

• Grateful

• Enjoy

• Breathe

• Connect

• Learn

• Inspire

• Reset

• Reuse/recycle

• Exhale

• Laugh

• Vegan

• Give

• Overcoming

• Relax

The most common word we saw was “love” and that made me smile. You all never cease to inspire us and to bring us joy. May we all do our best this year, whatever that looks like.

Stay safe, friends, and take care of yourselves.!!! xoxo

Is There Anything Better Than Fresh Air in the Winter?

Because is there? Really? We used to go to New York every Christmas when I was growing up to stay with my mom’s family for a week, and one of my favorite things to do as soon as we got there (after a 16 hour car ride) was to take in a delicious, deep gulp of the freezing winter air. I remember instantly feeling better, more relaxed, and more refreshed, just feeling the cool breeze on my face.

It’s one of the reasons I love this season so much, maybe even more than any of the other ones (except maybe fall). It surprises me every year when it gets as cold as it was yesterday here in Tennessee but I am always so grateful. Bundling up in warm layers that we only get to wear maybe 3 months out of the year while the freezing air is trying its best to get in is my idea of happiness.

We went out to the land last night and walked the majority of it as the sun was setting. The sky looks so different in the winter, especially at sunset. There is a vast emptiness to it that is equal parts haunting and beautiful to me.

I don’t think this view will ever get old. It’s at the top of the biggest hill on our land and overlooks the valley below. There’s a big rock pile up here that the kids love to slide down, which allows us a few minutes to take in the view. We’ve been talking lately about how perfectly content and happy we could be being out at the land full-time. What would that look like, though? Would we fix up and move into Holiday House? Would we renovate the metal building? For now, just being out here in any capacity is enough for us.

Here’s to many more layers and cold winter nights.

Finding Joy in the Every Day

Sometimes it seems like we’ve all had to become experts at finding the silver lining, the beauty, in the every day moments over the last year. Covid cases (and deaths) are rising at an unimaginable, heartbreaking rate, and I wake up almost every morning to a new alert about how much worse this pandemic has gotten, and potentially will get. And while that kind of news has become the “new normal”, is there anything really that normal about so many people getting sick? Even after a year?

All of that to say, I am holding on to the things that bring me joy in daily, seemingly ordinary moments of our life more than ever. Like last night, we went for a walk before dinner and the sun had just started to set and it was so cold outside, but the kids didn’t seem to mind- they were just happy to be out of the house and riding their scooters. And it felt unbelievably wonderful to get out of the house and outside of our minds for a minute and just breathe, and just be (which is one of our new words for 2021!).

It was a short walk, but it was everything I think we all needed it to be. Sis had her new buggy that she was using as a stroller for her baby doll that PJ wrapped up in a scarf to keep it warm for her (so cute), and the boys were zipping past us on their scooters with light up wheels that PJ’s mom got them for Christmas. And it was nice, and it was comforting, and it felt good.

We found ways to carve out our own happiness and take some time for ourselves last year during the madness and taking walks was one of those ways. We have really slowed down on doing them every day ever since the weather started changing, but it’s nothing a big coat and some warm boots can’t fix. I think we easily forget how important these walks are for our mental health, otherwise there’s no way we would ever slack on them. They almost instantly make me feel calmer, more relaxed. Do you know what I mean?

Some of our neighbors still have their Christmas lights up and it made for some nice ambiance on the way home last night. Sis shrieked with surprise when we walked past some wrapped around trees, as if this was her first time seeing them and they haven’t been up for the last 3 months.

Someone on Instagram responded to a story I did of sis walking with her stroller saying “she’s on a mission!”, and it made me laugh because she truly always is, and she makes us laugh all the time with her wit and determination. How did we get so lucky?

Here's to finding the joy in the every day! xo

A Rainy Monday at Home

Happy Monday, friend.

It feels weird to even add the clarification “at home” in the title of this post, since we’ve literally been home for almost a year now (also feels weird to say that) but nonetheless, it was rainy, today is Monday, and we did spend it at home.

I was actually quite surprised to wake up to rain this morning since we had the most beautiful sunny day yesterday, but (and if you’ve been reading for a while now, you already know this) I am a sucker for a cozy rainy day spent inside cleaning, cooking, playing, and working around the house. My brother always makes a point to bring up how annoyed he gets when people are surprised by the weather when we have a 24/7 weather app directly on our phones to check at our leisure, but I am telling myself (and you) that I like surprises because they keep me on my toes and that’s my excuse. If you’re reading this, Tay, I’m sorry.

PJ has been on a kick lately organizing our entire house, much to my gratitude. We have so. much. clutter. that has been building up in our home for years. He has thrown away huge garbage bags worth of junk and gotten rid of so many random boxes around the house and it feels like a giant weight is slowly being lifted with every piece of discarded trash. Thank you, PJ, for simplifying our life and making our home so much cleaner!

Normally the kids are restless on rainy days, but today they kept themselves busy in between educational videos on YouTube and me teaching older brother school. Our days lately consist of an unbalanced mixture of school and work and house cleaning and it’s been such a season of adjustment for us as parents and as a couple. Who ever would have thought we’d all be teachers in one way or another this time last year? On that note, teaching kindergarten is no joke and not for the faint of heart. Take it from me.

PS: Sex and the City is coming back!

Sometimes It’s Okay to Stay Up Late on a Saturday Night

And jump and climb on the bed while we fold clothes and put together our new workout machine. It’s late. We’re all tired. But it’s the weekend, and these days, Saturday nights mean something different with 3 kids running around the house :).

Hope you have a lovely Saturday night, too, friend.

xo

Little Sis Turns 3 Today!

Happy birthday to the one who brings us so much joy. What would we do without her and her sassy, funny, smart, and sweet looks she gives every day? When she came to live with us she was only 1 1/2 years old, and it’s mind boggling to think she is now 3 and talking more and more every day. She is becoming so independent and loves to do things on her own (as much as she can, anyway). She loves to play with water and pour it into cups and bowls and pretend to cook food for us (the way she goes about it is hilarious).

We feel so grateful to take care of her and have her in our life. She is pure love. She is everything and more.

One of Those Days

Dear friend,

Yesterday was one of those hard, frustrating foster parent days you hear about all the time and pray doesn’t happen to you. As much good as the foster system does, it’s an incredibly challenging thing to navigate, especially when you truly care about the kiddos (the heartbreaking truth is there are waaaay too many bad foster parents out there who are in it for the wrong reasons).

We had been looking forward to a very specific court date for months, and it was supposed to be tomorrow, but got postponed indefinitely because of a new Supreme Court order banning all in-person court cases from happening unless they’re an emergency or meet certain guidelines, an unfortunately our case doesn’t meet them.

PJ was on the phone all morning trying to sort it out. One of the most frustrating parts is just how many people you have to go through to get something, anything, accomplished. So very many people are involved who make important decisions, people with a lot more power than you feel that you have, which oftentimes can leave you feeling helpless and on your own.

But on the bright side, I am grateful to have a husband who doesn’t ever give up no matter what and who fights for what is right. I am grateful that we have these kids who have changed our lives, for the better, in every way imaginable. And I am grateful to have a sister who orders Crumbl Cookies to be delivered to our house in an attempt to cheer us up. And you know what? It actually brightened my day to see that bright pink box and that sweet little note on our doorstep. Thank you, Sydney. I love you.

I really don’t like to post negative things on here, but I feel it’s important to note that, if you’re thinking of becoming a foster parent (which has been the most rewarding experience of our lives and I encourage you to consider becoming one!!), please be prepared for hard days, a rollercoaster of emotions, and intense feelings of frustration.

Though, when I pause to think about it, I think that’s just called being a parent?

We Painted the Living Room! (Finally)

After almost four years of trying to talk PJ into agreeing that the living room (and the rest of our house, but that’s a different story) should be white, he finally agreed to us painting it the other night, and he even helped me trim.

For reference, I’m usually the one who paints while PJ demos and builds. It just works for us. But the night we started painting, I rolled the walls while he cut around the trim and it went soooo much faster. And tonight I officially finished painting the rest of the walls and edges and it’s complete! It feels so much lighter and brighter in here and we love it. We’re far from finished, needing art and curtains for layering and finishing touches, and we plan to remove the chandelier (from when it was our dining room) but it feels like a fresh start for the new year.

I say “finally” painting the living room, but to be honest, we loved the warm, earthy color it was before. We get questions on what color it is all the time, and it’s called Urban Putty by Sherwin Williams. It’s the absolute most perfect neutral color of all time and we still swear by it. But, four years into living in this house, our style has slightly changed, and we’re looking to switch things up a bit in each room. We’re also finally taking the time to decorate certain rooms we didn’t make time for before because we have been working on some kind of project nonstop for the last whoknowshowmanyyears. We’re still working on about two right now, but we’re just going for it and making time now. Maybe it’s the optimism and inspiration that comes with a new year?

We can’t wait to share the after photos and settle into this space again. We both have a vision in our head of how we want the room to end up looking and we’re so excited to make it come to life.